I’m Sorry. I Didn’t Like Civil War.

This weekend was the much anticipated opening of Marvel’s latest blockbuster: Captain America: Civil War. It’s from a studio I have learned to trust. It had a superior trailer to and got way better reviews than Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice. I was still disappointed.

I went into the movie nervous but hoping to enjoy myself. I enjoy Marvel and love the Captain America franchise. Winter Soldier might be my favorite superhero movie. But I like it when my superheroes are people I can look up to and I don’t like it when they fight.

I’ll start with some positives: if a mindless action movie is what you’re looking for, this is a good one. There’s some great set pieces from chase scenes to fights to explosions. It was fun to see some of my favorite characters out doing their thing. Black Widow kicks ass. Hawkeye acts more like the Matt Fraction Hawkeye than ever before and that’s basically all I want ever. Scarlet Witch remains lovely and her interactions with Vision hinted at interesting things to come. I was here for Black Panther and Chadwick Boseman as T’Challa was far and away the best part of the movie. But really I went to see the end of the Steve and Buck arc that Winter Soldier started. And that’s where the trouble begins.

I have a lot of feelings about Captain America. I love him for all his square jawed, scrappy, idealistic heroism. I love the idea that with the right amount of heart and super serum any scrappy little kid could be a hero. I love that he never gives up and never backs down when he sees injustice. Somehow this movie managed to pervert all of the things I love about Steve Rogers.

The Steve Rogers I love is on the side of law and order. I’ll maintain that Winter Solider is the fascinating film it is because Captain American finds himself operating outside the law, and that’s a sign that something is WRONG. Not just a little wrong, but cataclysmically wrong.  And it turns out everyone’s Nazis, so yeah. That’s a problem. Therefore, in this movie when Captain America again finds himself opposing law and order, everything seems wrong. Because this time there is no decades-old conspiracy. The law and order he’s opposing is the United Nations. And it’s his own friends and teammates.

Following unacceptable collateral damage on several missions, the Avengers are asked to submit to UN governance which will provide oversite to keep the world safe. Sure, there’s some serious flaws in that plan, but on its face that doesn’t sound like a bad idea. It might be good for the people with ultimate power to answer to the people they protect. And the idea is backed by Iron Man. Anything that’s important enough to make chaotic-good spoiled playboy Tony Stark read legal documents and sit in on governance meetings clearly deserves attention.

Except Steve dismisses it out of hand. Which sounds nothing like the Steve Rogers I want to believe in.  Now let’s talk about the ‘reason’ Steve throws it all away: Bucky. Again, I have a lot of feelings here. The concept of The Winter Soldier – a good man being forced to become a mindless weapon that goes counter to everything he believes in–hurts so good. It combines all kinds of interesting moral questions into one painful emotional package. It’s excellent storytelling. But it falls apart in this movie.

In the movie we see Bucky as Winter Soldier destroying stuff. We also see Bucky outside of his brainwashing. But he’s not an emotional wreak over the things he’s been forced to do. He’s still kind of killing random people and acting like a dick. He’s been framed for some terrorist acts, but he doesn’t help his case much. And Cap comes running in, against international law, to try and save Bucky from the people who want to bring him to justice for the things he didn’t do. And then they don’t talk their way out. They fight their way out with lethal force. It’s hard to root for someone who kills people trying to enforce the law.

Basically, my review boils down to there not being enough plot here to make me believe that my heroes would act so unheroic. Sure, there’s some powerful emotional forces at play here. Steve’s loyalty to his lifelong friend and Tony’s love for his family. But neither of them get leveraged quite enough for me to enjoy or even justify seeing two heroes I like smashing the shit out of each other. If I wanted to see powerful people not listen to each other, I could just watch politics dang it!

There were some fun moments. Watching Bucky and Falcon interact was delightful. Even despite my deep weariness of Spiderman reboots, the new Peter Parker is reasonably charming. But it’s so frustrating to see characters I care about never bother to stop and think for one damn second. The only character who does think also gets the only true heroic moment of the movie.  (Spoilers)

After committing himself to hunting down Bucky for his father’s murder, T’Challa learns that Bucky was framed. While Cap and Iron Man beat the shit out of each other, the Black Panther corners the real killer and brings him to justice. And I don’t mean he murders him. I mean brings him to actual justice by capturing him and turning him over to the proper authorities. That’s what I expect from my heroes. I expect them to rise above petty jealousy and their own grudges. I expect them to be able to put their emotions aside and act in the interest of the greater good. What a pity that with over a dozen superheroes in this movie, only one of them manages an act of heroism worth remembering.

10 Cloverfield Lane: Spoiler Free and Mostly Spoilery Reviews

Here’s my spoiler-free review of 10 Cloverfield Lane: it was great, you should go see it. All three actors do a fantastic job, especially John Goodman. It’s an intimate, thrilling, engrossing little jewel of a film. Now go see it and come back.

Ok. Here’s the real “spoilers-ahead” review because that’s about all I can say without ruining something for you. Here we go. Michelle wakes up in a basement injured. The last thing she remembers is being in a car accident. She quickly finds out that she’s apparently captive in the basement of John Goodman’s bunker. Supposedly while she was unconscious the world experienced some sort of apocalypse and John Goodman has saved her life…or has he?

Michelle isn’t the only one waiting out the end of the world down here, she’s joined by local farm boy Emmett who says he fought his way in when he realized what was happening outside. The whole thing looks pretty fishy. Why can’t they call anyone? Is there really no one to call? How do you establish the real end of the world? Why does Howard (John Goodman’s character) have a bunch of belongings for a teenage girl? Was he the one who caused Michelle’s car wreak in the first place? Is he crazy, harmless, murderous, a quirky Good Samaritan, or some combination thereof? As the movie unravels, it all gets explored and exploded. Hey that was all kind of spoiler free! Don’t expect that to last!

A note about the acting in this movie: it’s all excellent. You’ll hear a lot about John Goodman in this movie because his understated performance is brilliant. Any lesser actor could have made one misstep that betrayed Howard’s motives, but at the end of the movie I was still left guessing. Clearly Howard is not a good guy, and the circumstantial evidence about his relationship with a missing teenage girl looks really bad. But what were his intentions with Michelle? We’ll never know and that’s a huge boon to the movie.

Mary Elizabeth Winstead as Michelle also delivers an amazing performance that will hopefully launch her into a new level in her already pretty cool career. She is so sympathetic, so smart, so subtle, and so easy to root for as she rallies all of her resources to escape and survive. By the end of the film she was so awesome the best parallel I can come up with is Sara Connor at the end of Terminator. That’s about as highly as I can praise a female sci-fi lead.

And then there’s John Gallagher Jr. as Emmett. Now I should disclose that I’ve had a giant talent crush on him since 2006 when he starred as Moritz in the Broadway musical Spring Awakening, so I find it hard to be unbiased. But he was refreshingly sincere, kind, and just so darn likable as Michelle’s ally in hell. Their moments together as they wrestle with regrets and their search for the truth are the emotional core that made me care deeply about the survival of these characters. Also did I mention he’s adorable?

10 Cloverfield Lane is a rare and lovely movie that’s completely original while somewhat associated with an existing franchise (I’ll direct you elsewhere in the internet for debates on whether or not this even takes place in the same timeline or universe as Cloverfield). It has a fascinating woman at the center of the story. And while Michelle is an incredible survivor and the threat of violence is ever-present, it’s refreshing in this era of Game Of Thrones and exploitation of sexual violence for entertainment to have a movie where threats are real and frightening, but don’t turn graphic or even materialize at all. Sometimes the scariest things out there really are the what-ifs. 10 Cloverfield Lane is in intense, gratifying, truly original work. Go see it!

Prerequisites: Superman

While there are many actors that become identified with a character, perhaps the most iconic pair is Christopher Reeve and Superman. For years I had heard that Mr. Reeve was the definitive Superman, and now I know why. Watching him in the 1978 Superman, you can see this was the role he was born to play. From his incredible chin to his ability to make cheesy lines sound sincere, Christopher Reeve IS Superman.

Now that I’ve stated the obvious, this movie was a lot of fun. I sat down to watch it with several good friends and would highly recommend that method. Frankly, I went into this movie expecting some serious 70s cheese. I was not disappointed, but I also found that several parts of the movie rose above kitsch and were truly endearing.

The movie begins on Superman’s home planet Krypton with his father Jor-El fighting to stop the planet’s destruction. The entire sequence is bizarre. First there’s the very existence of Marlon Brando as Jor-El, which is one of those truly strange and magical casting choices that keeps on giving. Then there’s the questionable decision to spend the first few moments of the movie setting up the exile of General Zod, a plot point that does not feature into the movie at all. (I’ve been told it’s setup for the sequel). Then there’s the whole sending Superman to earth in a giant ice crystal spaceship while his planet dies around him sequence which is delightfully cheesy and strange.

From there the movie becomes less WTF and more charming. Superman’s upbringing as Clark Kent is adorable. Then he goes to Metropolis and meets Lois Lane, who is THE BEST. I loved Margot Kidder as Lois Lane pretty hard. I expected a fair amount of old-fashioned sexism, but this Lois Lane is smart, intense, and dedicated to her job. She can’t spell worth a damn, but she’s still determined to get the scoop and be the best journalist in Manhattan. I mean Metropolis.

Of course, her interactions with Superman are still frequently cringe worthy. The Peter Pan-esque scene where he takes her flying is truly ridiculous. But I also found a lot that was endearing about their relationship and Lois’s attempt to keep everything as professional as she can. Frankly, I found Kidder’s Lois Lane more fun and just as empowered or evolved as the Lois Amy Adams is playing in the current franchise.

As much as I was surprised by how impressed I was by Lois Lane, I was equally surprised at how lame Gene Hackman was as Lex Luthor. In modern superhero movies there seems to be a deep distrust of the heroes themselves, so the emphasis has shifted to creating more and more intense and interesting villains. This is not that. Gene Hackman is from the cartoonishly incompetent school of villain. He makes Jack Nicholson in Batman look scary.

There were moments of the movie I loved. Some, like Lois interviewing Superman, I loved for what they were. Some I loved because I watched this movie with friends and could laugh at the inconsistencies and ridiculousness. My favorite moment? When Superman delivers a boat full of villains to the police station, one friend said “Wait, that boat is named Serenidy. With a d.” Another friend quipped “Lois Lane named that boat.”

My recommendation? Get some friends and some pizza and enjoy this movie for the cheesy, iconic, super-fun, kitschy mess that it is.

2015 Year In Review: Classic Movies

Happy Holidays everyone! I hope whatever you celebrate has been wonderful. 2015 is coming to a close this week, and I’m feeling reflective. This blog has been my wild experiment of the year. I officially started it back in February (but was thinking and writing for it long before that) and have truly enjoyed working on this. This week I’ll be looking back at some of the highlights of my first year as a blogger.

I started this blog to have somewhere I could talk about my various nerd interests, and to document my efforts to catch up on the many fun, geeky things I’ve missed out on in the past. When I started this blog, movies were a big part of what I had in mind. My movie watching life was missing many of the classics, and I’ve covered a lot of ground this year. And while I’m glad I can say I’ve finally seen staples like Temple of Doom and Blade Runner, here’s my highlights from the year.

Favorite Classic Movie of the Year: Labyrinth

I watched a lot of classic movies this year, but none of them tickled me quite as much as Jim Henson’s lovely Labyrinth. I’m a sucker for Jim Henson’s sense of joy, wonderment, and the truly strange. I’m a sucker for puppets. I love how unique the film was. And seriously it’s hard to beat David Bowie in one of the strangest, creepiest, and most iconic moments of his career. And I’ve had this stuck in my head for the rest of the year:

So Bad It’s Good Movie of the Year: Dune

This was one of my first movie reviews for this blog, and it remains one of my favorites. The 1987 Dune movie by David Lynch is a true disaster of a film. It’s erratic, makes no sense, has a truly bizarre cast and some seriously weird effects, but I enjoyed every minute of it. (Although I’m guessing if I watched the 4 hour director’s cut, I might not feel the same.) I still think back and laugh about this one on a regular basis. That’s a lot more than I can say about Mad Max.

 

I feel like I should also write about my favorite new science fiction or fantasy movie that came out this year, but really with The Force Awakens still consuming my whole brain, there’s not a competition. Maybe next year.

Prerequisites: Temple of Doom

I started this blog to chronicle my ongoing efforts to make myself a better nerd by catching up on some essential nerd touchstones that I’ve missed. I was missing some big ones (*cough* Blade Runner *cough*), but the granddaddy of them all might be Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom.

Now, like every red blooded American, I love Indiana Jones. I’ve seen the first and third installments many times. From the first time I saw Raiders of the Lost Ark at like age 7, I wanted to be Marion Ravenwood. And who can resist the charms of a Harrison Ford/Sean Connery team up? But I just never watched the second movie. Mostly because every time I told someone that they’d look deeply shocked and appalled for 30 seconds, and then shrug and say “actually I guess you don’t really need to.”

But I FINALLY did it! I sat down at watched the original prequel. What did I think of it?

Actually I liked it more than I expected to. This might be the weakest Indiana Jones movie, but it’s still an Indiana Jones movie. It has everything you’d expect: the whip, the gun, the great hat, the large amounts of Harrison Ford’s chest hanging out there and his face being smugly wonderful. There’s goofy magic thinly disguised as “archeology,” there’s lots of gross stuff with bugs, there’s an obligatory Indiana Jones in a sport coat scene. Basically, there’s lots of fun to be had.

Since I have a pulse, I am aware of the reason the movie is so derided: Short Round. And sure, the little proto-Jar Jar was kind of annoying. Sure, have a sidekick, but does he need that much screen time? Does he have to be so shrill and sycophantic? But I have to say, considering the internet might have had me believe the kid peed on the Holy Gail and then kicked Indy in the nuts, he really wasn’t that bad. At times the kid was kind of cute. Pretty darn racist, but cute.

Who I really did have an issue with was female-lead Willie Scott. Again, I’m a Marion fan from way back. I like a woman who is really Indiana’s equal. Marion can think, fight, and drink you under the table and generally take care of herself (when not stuffed in a basket). Willie, however, was a caricature of every bad female stereotype. She’s shill, annoying, whiney, useless, and can’t stay out of trouble. I didn’t understand or care about the romantic plot at all.

It’s also interesting to note that this is the only Indiana Jones movie that doesn’t deal with the Judeo-Christian tradition, and it’s also the most bizarre. You can tell that the writers felt much freer to just totally make up bullshit when it wasn’t the religious tradition they were raised in. Which is pretty racist and ridiculous. But then there’s this.

And this

And taken together, they’re about what I expected.

I Can’t Stop Freaking Out About the New Star Wars Trailer

You guys I just sat down and watched the new trailer for Star Wars: The Force Awakens three times. The first time I screamed. The second time I cried. The third time I scream-cried. My cat is really concerned right now.

Because I can’t help myself, here’s a totally random and unorganized list of reasons I’m so excited I might poop myself:

• EVERYTHING IS SO BEAUTIFUL
• The opening shot of Daisy Ridley’s character just reinforces my belief that I am 100% going to love her.
• It’s a rule now. Every Star Wars trilogy has to start with a “no one” on Tatooine. I’m so excited to meet the new spiritual successor to Luke and Anakin’s legacy.
• You guys. This wasn’t a disguise. We get to see the inner lives of Stormtroopers! That’s going to be John Boyega’s deal and I’m super excited. Related newsflash: Stormtroopers have inner lives!
• THOSE TIE FIGHTERS CHASING THE FALCON OVER THE RUINS OF A STAR DESTROYER WHILE THE THEME PLAYS IN THE BACKGROUND. I’M NOT CRYING YOU’RE CRYING.
• They’re setting up the entire original trilogy as a legend (loaded word, sorry EU fans) and then our new heroes get to meet the legends!
• Harrison Ford is your Obi Wan. Harrison Ford is your grumpy old guru.
• Harrison Ford’s face I can’t even handle it.
• I’m so excited for this new generation meets old generation and discovers that everything you’ve heard and dreamed of is true storyline. That’s one of my favorite story tropes. It’s going to be great.
• Yes generic bad guy. You just try to fulfil Darth Vader’s twisted legacy. You hang onto that burned Vader mask. You wear your crazy chrome facemask. I’m digging all of it.
• THIS CHRISTMAS!!!
• Did John Boyega just do a double-take when he saw how hot that X-Wing pilot was? Because I did. Hello Poe Dameron. (And thanks Vanity Fair for my new pinup)
• 
• I got super emotional when I saw Chewbacca. I’m not afraid to admit that.
• If we get inner lives of Stormtroopers, what does that tell us about Gwendoline Christie as the badass shiny Stormtrooper Captain Phasma?
• Leia why are you hugging Han like that? Is it because we haven’t seen Luke yet? What happened to Luke?
• I don’t think you understand how much Leia means to me. I wanted to be her when I was a kid. Now I want her to be everyone’s mentor/mother/President/spirit guide. Seeing her, hearing her, knowing that she’s still pivotal now is so exciting and important to me.
• Seriously everyone where the fuck is Luke Skywalker??? I freak out every time we see the same shot of the metal hand on R2-D2.
• It’s so exciting to get snatches of ideas about this story and what they might be doing. And it’s so damn exciting that every piece of information I get just makes me more confident that they are going to do this right.
• God the music at the end is so good. It’s all so good. It’s beautifully shot. It’s amazingly edited. I’m so excited for this movie.

Ok. I’m going to stop the random word vomit to say something really important to me. I cannot express how exciting and meaningful it is to see more and more them setting up Daisy Ridley’s Rey as our main hero and protagonist. She’s the start of the trailer and the top of the poster. She’s clearly who they’re setting up to follow in the hero’s journey from back-world nobody to savior of the universe.

As someone who remembers being a little girl wanting so much to be Luke Skywalker, the idea that there’s a whole generation of little girls who will be able to watch this movie and see a hero that looks like them makes me want to cry my eyes out. I’m also super excited to see John Boyega being set up as our other hero for exactly the same reasons. The amazing allure of science fiction is that it’s a whole other world without all of our own bullshit prejudices weighing it down. It’s amazing to see the Star Wars franchise finally embracing what that potential can mean for diversity. And what that potential can mean for kids around the world. Star Wars shaped my dreams, my play, my fantasy, my life. It’s so exciting to see us doing that again for a whole new generation and possibly even improving on what came before.

Now what are you doing reading my blog?? Go watch the trailer again!

Prerequisites: Labyrinth

Jim Henson + David Bowie. You guys, it’s been almost 30 years, and I still don’t think anyone knows how this bizarre combination came to be. If you do, enlighten me, I’m sure it’s a fascinating story.

Somehow I had never seen this piece of nostalgic 80s magic. I was born a couple of years after it came out, so I guess I just missed it. I was afraid that maybe it was one of those things you have to see as a kid in order to love as an adult, but I was worried for nothing. This movie is strange, ridiculous, and magical. I enjoyed myself immensely. I don’t really know what to say about this other than to just gush.

Labyrinth has the perfect mix of 80s nostalgia and “what the fuck” factor. There’s the amazingly bad CGI owl (first of its kind) in the opening credits, David Bowie prancing around like the svelte little elf-man he is, poor Jennifer Connelly acting as hard as she can, the flawless ballroom scene, the MC Escher room, the creepy baby. I’ve had “Magic Dance” stuck in my head for a week for reasons I can’t really articulate. Also everyone’s eyebrow game is seriously on point.

 

Speaking of eyebrows: Bowie Bowie Bowie. What are you doing here? With the eyebrows and the bulge and the hair that makes me want to quote Mean Girls (it’s so big because it has secrets in it). David Bowie is so strange and androgynous and just the right kind of weird. He’s creepy and off in just the right way. He looks so perfectly at home in freaky Goblin-land and so perfectly un-used to holding a baby. But watching him interact with children doesn’t give me that same squicked out feeling I got watching Johnny Depp in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Basically he’s wonderfully creepy without ever ringing the pedophile bells, and that’s an important line to stay on the right side of. And god those eyebrows. What more can I say?

Finally, we need to talk about Jim Henson. I have to say how much I respect his vision for the strange. Kids love weird, gross stuff, and this whole movie is a masterpiece of kid humor. All the puppets are odd and off-kilter in the same dark, weird, and appealing way that Doctor Who is at its best. I mean, there’s the flame puppets who take off their heads and throw them around and swallow their eyeballs. There’s the weird chomping creatures on sticks. There’s a farting swamp of eternal stench! Kids love that nonsense, and let’s be real, adults like me do too. And really I would expect no less from the man who brought us the eternal and dysfunctional love between a frog and a pig.

Mad Maxes

Last Saturday I watched two movies in one day that both made me go “what the hell just happened?” One of them in an awesome way, one of them in a terrible way. They were Mad Max and Mad Max: Fury Road.

The Mad Max series has been one of those things where I went from knowing nothing to having it be everywhere in days. One day my friend Tarra texts me saying we need to talk about this new thing she’s into, and the next minute it’s the number two movie at the box office and has taken over my Facebook and Twitter with feminist accolades/angry MRAs. So I went to see Fury Road, but decided to watch the original first. I would have watched all of the predecessors, but ran out of time. (Stay tuned for my thoughts on Road Warrior and Beyond Tunderdome. I’m sure they’re coming soon.)

Holy crap. What? That’s my reaction to both movies. I’ll start with the lovefest for Fury Road. Everything you’ve heard is true. It’s beautiful.

It’s a solid plot with adrenaline junkie action out the wazoo. It’s going to destroy all the men in America by daring to create an action movie where women get to play actual characters with actual thoughts and not just objects. Charlize Theron deserves every compliment given her and then some. I could go on and on about the movie and how much I enjoyed it.

But my overwhelming thought when the movie was over was how the hell did we get here from here?

 

Seriously. I watched the first movie and almost didn’t go see the new one. It just struck me as so mind-bendingly bad I didn’t know what to do with myself. I have so many questions. How the hell did we get here? Why do I care about this character? Is that guy’s name really Toecutter? Did they really run over that baby? And Max’s arm? What the eff is with the weird scene-transition bird?

I’ve been trying for a week to trace how George Miller got from the strange, slightly-dilapidated world of Mad Max to the beautifully bonkers desert dystopia of Fury Road. In true Tarra fashion, my lovely friend has backed up her position that Mad Max is a movie worth watching by sending me a lot of articles about its influence. I’ve done my research, and it’s starting to make sense.

The more I read about the process of making Mad Max, the more I can see the same attention to detail and design throughout. 1979 George Miller scraping together a movie on $350,000, but still being committed enough to use practical stunts, real-speed shots, and hiring an actual biker gang doesn’t seem that far off from 2015 George Miller still using mostly practical stunts and hiring Eve Ensler to consult on how different women react to trauma. His budget just got bigger and he just got older and wiser.

And I’ve got to give George this, both movies have some pretty amazing car chases. The effects are impressive, especially considering that real people actually did all of those things. In fact, when the first movies came out, rumors went around that stunt men had died making Mad Max. They were totally false, but it is hard to watch all that metal carnage and believe everyone walked away.

Speaking of the carnage, the other piece of common DNA that struck me was the violence. I enjoyed the heck out of Fury Road, but I also found myself watching the moving and wondering what it says about our culture that our entertainment is this bloodthirsty. It actually reminded me of my favorite quote from a review of the first movie; Phillip Adams saying that the movie had “all the emotional uplift of Mein Kampf” and would be “a special favourite of rapists, sadists, child murderers and incipient [Charles] Mansons.” I think the world has changed a lot, and we’re no longer surprised by movies with high body counts and lots of ‘spolsions. But both films have a couple of intimate moments where real fear and violence creep in and become truly unsettling.

I can see in the bookends of the Mad Max series a director of incredible vision trying to entertain us and make us think. I’m also immensely grateful for Mad Max, terrible Power Point style screen transitions and all, because it lead us here.

Supergirl, Black Widow, and Girl Power

This week two hilarious and amazing videos of media starring powerful super-women hit the internet. They were both fairly similar. I loved both of them. One of them was a joke.

SNL had Scarlett Johansson on the show and created the “oh my god it’s so funny and so real it hurts” fake trailer for a Black Widow movie. It’s so spot on it’s scary. It opens with epic manly voiceover and the all-too-real question “Does Marvel not know now to make a girl superhero movie?” Cue the Sex & the City style shots of Black Widow in New York having trouble with heels and working her shitty job in a trendy media office (because that’s what women do). There’s hilarious romcom elements like her girl talking with Thor and Cap and trying to find the man who’s really worthy of her attention. It’s goofy and hilarious and perfectly encapsulates all the clichés of “women’s stories” that are shoved down our throats by media producers who have apparently never met a woman.

That was still fresh on my mind when I watched the trailer for Supergirl, and the similarities are a little spooky. Kara Zor-El works in a trendy media office where she uses her superpowers to sense when her mean boss is coming. She gets asked out on a date by a cute guy, and clearly has a crush on another cute guy. And oh yeah. She has fucking superpowers. In so many ways, this preview hits all the same clichés as SNL’s Black Widow. There’s romcom music and a trendy media job and an overemphasis on romance and an entirely unrealistic “New York” apartment. And most worrying of all, there’s Supergirl hiding her powers and maybe not believing in who she is. But then, the preview also literally addresses all of this criticism at once.

When Supergirl goes public and gets her name, our undercover heroine questions it. Why Supergirl and not at least Superwoman? And her boss gives her a magical and thorough dressing down of the issue. “What do you think is so bad about girl? I’m a girl. And your boss. And powerful, and rich, and hot, and smart. So if you perceive Supergirl as anything less than excellent, isn’t the real problem you?”

Standing ovation. Well said. That quote gets at the heart of what I love about this trailer. I’m a 90s girl. I grew up with Girl Power and the sort of bubbly, adorable, empowering feminism that Supergirl just might be trying to bring back.

The trailer has gotten criticism for being too girly, but really I could criticize almost every other superhero trailer ever for being too stereotypically manly. Real life men have about as much to do with the brooding, testosterone soaked world of the Batman v Superman trailer as real life women have to do with the overly emotional, impeccably groomed world of the Supergirl trailer. We don’t actually expect our superhero media to reflect real life or real gender roles, so why start now?

Supergirl might be girly, but she also came off as funny, accessible, and powerful. And frankly I’m excited for children of all genders to see that strong and brave doesn’t have to be male, but also that girliness doesn’t have to be weak.

That’s real life. People are complex. This week I both ate a pan of brownies while on my period and got an awesome promotion at work. I can be stereotypically feminine and also a powerful, smart, well rounded person who knows more about Star Wars than 90% of the population. Maybe. Just maybe. We’re about to get a superhero who can do the same. I’ve got my fingers crossed and can’t wait to find out.

Top 10 Times The Avengers: Age of Ultron Felt Like Christmas

Seems obvious, but I’ll just say it: All the Spoilers Ahead.

I saw The Avengers: Age of Ultron on Thursday night at 10:00, and I basically spent the whole day before that feeling like a kid on Christmas Eve. I fondly remember seeing the first Avengers on opening night, spending the whole movie feeling like it was Christmas. Joss Whedon pulled off the amazing magic trick of giving me everything I wanted but didn’t even know I could ask for.

So when Ultron started I had the same sensation as a kid pulling off the wrapping paper. Like most Christmases, I got a lot of things I wanted and few things I didn’t. I’m sure I’ll do a more critical watch of the movie later, because was this a perfect movie? No. Did it feel a little scattered and rushed and unfocused? Sure. But did I leave it giddy and happy? You betcha. So brace yourselves for spoilers, don’t let the haters get you down, and bask in the Whedon afterglow with me in my countdown of 10 Moments the Avengers felt like Christmas.

10. The Star Wars trailer before it.

Ok. This is cheating, but OH MY GOD IT WAS SO GOOD ON THE BIG SCREEN.

9. I love a Robot (Not that robot)

I didn’t realize how attached I’d gotten to the disembodied voice that is JARVIS until he “died.” I mean, he’s been with us since MCU day one. He’s the kind, humorous, constant in Iron Man’s universe. And frankly, I was way more upset by his death than by the actual death of Quicksilver.

8. Hulktasha

This will be controversial, but I loved most of it. I loved seeing Natasha in love, but still putting her work first. I loved seeing the Hulk being much more in control of the rage because of her. And I squeed at being one step closer to the giant-people-carrying-little-people dream that I’d been harboring since the days of Ginger Haze’s early fan doodles. So come at me bro.

7. Science Bros

As much as I like Banner and Natasha, the Banner relationship I really care about is between him and Tony. There’s an entire blog post I will write some day about how science buddies is literally my favorite type of relationship in fiction. But suffice it to say, watching Stark and Banner bicker like an old married couple is exactly what I wanted.

6. “Multiplying Like Catholic Rabbits”

Fury’s line, Whedon’s wordplay. I’m adding it to the “things I say now” list.

5. The Helicarrier’s Triumphant Return

Sure, part of my brain was screaming “Who the fuck gave Fury back the flying death machines?” But 99% of my brain was screaming REDEMPTION!!!!

4. All things Scarlet Witch

Do I have a new favorite Avenger? Quite possibly. Sure her power are indicative of the scary world of unclear narrative rules and magic-heavy powers we’re entering. But goddam is she cool. Everyone else is suiting up and prepping for the big battle and she’s just standing there all nonchalant like “I can kill you with my brain,” and her brother’s like “at least bring a jacket.” Adorbs. She’s River Tam but less bonkers, and that’s just shiny with me.

3. The Hammer’s Grading Rubric

So everyone saw the clip of the party scene that got released months ago. And it included the moment where most of the Avengers try lifting Thor’s hammer. And I enjoyed it, but I was a little worried. I mean, macho boys being macho boys feels like a one-note joke to me. But the moment was charming and had great payoff. I loved seeing Cap budge the hammer, that worthy son of a –LANGUAGE! But mostly I loved that it set us up for the magic moment where The Vision grabbed that hammer like it wasn’t even a thing. PAYOFF.

2. Hawkeye Lays It Out

Hawkeye got a lot more to do in this movie, but by far one of my favorite moments of the whole thing was during the chaotic final battle where Hawkeye gives Wanda Maximoff the most realistic pep talk ever. The gist is basically “We’re on a flying city fighting killer robots and I have a bow and arrow. None of this makes sense. But do it anyway.” It’s exactly why these movies are completely ridiculous and completely endearing, all in a deadpan nutshell.

1. Whedon Theatre Jokes

Joss Whedon can have my heart forever if he just keeps making jokes that make my theatre nerd heart sing. Last time his “Shakespeare in the Park” crack had me giggling for days. This time it was “This day has been long. Like, Eugene O’Neil long.” So here’s my heart Joss. I look forward to the next time you break it.